Do you wish you knew how to help people make a change and bring out the best in those around you? Do you get frustrated by the way people around you act? Are members of your team not living up to their potential?
Then you came to the right place.
It can be hard to make a big change when you are weighing the time it’ll take, if you’re able to, and the benefits and drawbacks.
It can be even harder to get started if you feel like the change is being forced upon you. No one likes being told what to do – especially if they feel what they’re doing is adequate or better.
For anyone to change, there are four things we need:
- ownership of the change
- the physical ability to make the change
- emotional courage to experience difficult feelings
- future-proofing so people believe the change isn’t a waste of time
By the end of this post, you will understand all four and have a clear idea of how to inspire change in those around you. You’ll be able to create a more successful team at work or even a more exciting social life.
The Biggest Myth About Change
We are regularly told that people are resistant to change.
But what about all the ways people embrace change?
We move away from home, adopt new hobbies, make new friends, change jobs and careers, go back to school, get married, get divorced, have kids, make radical decisions during a midlife crisis, so on and so forth.
It’s not that we are resistant to change.
“People don’t resist change. They resist being changed.” – Peter Bregman on the AoC Podcast
Why?
As humans, we value our autonomy. We are willing to go to war against incredible odds to take back or achieve autonomy at individual and societal levels.
So if a friend approached me and said, “You need a more positive attitude!” my defenses would naturally go into overdrive.
“Need? What do you know about what I NEED? My attitude is positive enough already! I love my life! What do I need a more positive attitude for? I’m happy, I have great friends, and I live the life I want.”
The funny thing is I don’t feel I “need” a more positive attitude. But I would argue having a more positive attitude would benefit anyone, including myself.
The point is: the words we use and the way we communicate are important if we want to have a positive impact on those around us.
The 4 Things Everyone Needs Before Making a Change
A person needs the following qualities in order to change and make that change stick—even when doubt and criticism comes their way.
Ownership of the Change
To commit to making a change, I must first feel it’s my idea.
It doesn’t matter if I initially get the idea from someone else. It is important that I feel like it’s mine before I commit to changing.
For example,…
